When Be is not around, things get delayed or postponed, and sometimes even cancelled. Our Christmas 2007 is still pending Russian Santa’s arrival (aka Daddy). The kids’ big birthday bash got postponed to 2008 Chinese New Year. New Year’s celebration is still on hold – this explains why there was no fireworks seen in from our master bedroom. My birthday got called off. So I am thirty-sumfing-sumfing for another year or two month.
On my birthday (that got called off), I went on and got meself a car USB player anyway. Trading in the old-but-original Kenwood that I treasured all these years, I only had to fork out RM100. I must say, I was so proud of myself that day. Thanks to me bro, Key, for keeping MY feet on the ground and keeping me from spending RM900 on an upgrade (color screen one with built-in equalizer). The RM100 also-Kenwood is already as good if not better than my old one. At Volume 23, I wouldn’t hear it if I got rear-ended! Baler!
Also on my birthday that got a strike-down, I dragged Key to Motorola KLCC to temp myself to get an upgrade for my Samsung SGH P850 (suddenly a non-3G phone is as good as obsolete!) I was of course so tempted to angkat the RAZR2V9 di hari dan waktu yang sama ok! I had to jeling Key a few times to make sure he wasn’t going to serkup me with a straight-jacket or sangkar ayam! But he looked like he was so on the kegarisan ready to grab me away from my own temptation.
I managed to refrain myself that day – and managed to leave my number to Jack Yu and ask him to call me as soon as they had a Mahogany RAZR2V9. Black didn’t quite tickle my fancy.
When Be is not around, things do get delayed. I haven’t told him how 3G’ed I am now. If he ever asked why I had to get a 3G phone, I think I’m gonna have to use the G-spot excuse. Eesshhh! Enida! Good thing I have my own G-aji.
Nevertheless…bila kau (Be) tak di sampingku, it feels like I am walking forward backwards. I don’t know where I’m going but I’m going. I can’t go fast, but I can’t slow down. (But what I miss most is those little bussess on my hair.)
How Can I Not Love You
Cannot touch, cannot hold, cannot be together
Cannot love, cannot kiss, cannot love each other
Must be strong and we must let go
Cannot say what our hearts must know
How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walk away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone
Cannot dream, cannot share sweet and tender moments
Cannot feel how we feel
Must pretend it’s over
Must be brave and we must go on
Must not say
What we’ve known all along
How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walk away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone
How can I not love you
Must be brave and we must be strong
Cannot say what we’ve known all along
How can I not love you
What do I tell my heart
When do I not want you here in my arms
How does one walks away
From all of the memories
How do I not miss you when you are gone
How can I not love you
When you are gone
Questa è Enida 
Three months? Mak aiii! I don’t know if I can tell my heart to not leave my body if I have to do three months lah Nina.
The thing is, I am missing him for three people. It doesn’t only hurt, it is ‘painful’. Kitreena and I were just sitting in the car the other day listening to my new radio. It was ‘My Heart Will Go On’ playing and Kitreena, teary-eyed and all, said “Mommy, I miss Daddy!”
What do you say to a child – who has no concept of time – missing her Daddy that badly?
We started re-counting the sleeps that night.
I’m hangin’ on to my heart for dear life. Hee hee.
the feeling is so familiar… these days 10 days is such a struggle already, don’t know how i managed 3 whole mths with him being away last time…
hang on there ngah!!