Saya tak sambut Hari Ibu.
Kalau sambut pun mungkin hanya dengan meluangkan waktu dengan anak-anak tanpa menjawap telefon selama 12 jam. Atau mungkin melakukan aktiviti di luar rutin. Contohnya Hari Ibu tahun ini saya ke Cold Storage membeli barang dapur bersama Monchies, dan membiarkan mereka memilih makanan bukan-kampung (seperti makanan biasa emak mereka). Antara pilihan anak-anak ialah keju sampai 4 jenis, yoghurt, artichoke, sauerkraut, chorizo, bagel dan ciabatta. Saya dah terbiasa membeli barang dapur di Tesco Online, lupa selera anak-anak yang tak berapa nak hidup dengan gaya kampung saya ini. Anak-anak yang separuh sana, separuh sini.
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In reality, my Mother’s Day this year and the years before was just like any other given Saturday, Sunday or school holiday. It wasn’t so much about celebrating it at a special place with a special cake wishing a special wish. In fact, this year, on Mother’s Day, I sat my kids down for a little talk about rules and discipline. I couldn’t stop being a mother just because I was celebrated. Kitreena needed some serious nudge on punctuality, while Edrick needed some slap on the wrist on homework procrastination. And me, The Mommy, needed to improve our communication. Everybody seemed to be assuming everything these days. So, it was my duty to bring things back in order immediately. So what if it was the Mother’s Day?
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But knowing me yang bukan jenis membebel ni, all I could ask from Monchies was some understanding that I am struggling with this parenting position. It is an extremely tough job. One that I can’t quit (and won’t, even if I could), and it is one that I can’t take a leave from. This year, on Mother’s Day I ended up begging Monchies to help me make it easier by keeping time, as none of us could have that May 10th of 2015 back. No rerun either. There is no way I could put back the clock. As much as I enjoy parenting, I would really like my children to cooperate with me in keeping things in order. Time, especially.
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Today and this long weekend for some reason, it has felt like Mother’s Day all over again when I finally shut down my phone, ignoring many messages and taking no calls. Somehow, my ex-husband’s birthday recently and his absence in the kids’ life has made me realize that I have only been a mother to Monchies and that is not enough. I am now learning to be a better father by engaging in physical activities more than I ever did before.
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Wish me luck on the water slides tomorrow!
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Adelaide, 2007: Two kids, two wheels and now two worlds apart.
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Questa è Enida 
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