Posted in Monchies, tagged Parenting on June 9, 2012| 1 Comment »
On the way back from school…
Edrick: Kitreena, could you please stop singing that song?
Kitreena: But I like singing it.
Edrick: But could you please stop it, I am trying to take a nap.
Kitreena: Go ahead, take your nap.
Edrick: But I can’t do it when you sing that song.
Kitreena: Why not?
Edrick: Because your singing makes my brain tell me to dance!
*Kitreena sings louder*
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Posted in Monchies, tagged Parenting on June 2, 2012| Leave a Comment »
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Edrick had his show-n-tell today, just like every Friday. And the topic was of course ‘My Father’. It’s June. What else! I printed out pictures of him and Daddy, and Edrick was to tell his class everything he wanted to tell about Daddy.
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He practiced and practiced on the way to school. It was at least 4 rounds and every time, he would say almost totally different facts about Daddy. And in one of the rounds, as I knew he would say it after spending two weeks with Daddy, and not hearing a word from him now almost three weeks since Daddy returned to Moscow… Edrick said that he missed Daddy very very very much.
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He didn’t cry.
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I did.
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Posted in Monchies, tagged Parenting on May 2, 2012| 1 Comment »
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Kitreena obviously had been thinking. So one morning last week on the way to school, we had a few kilometers of this conversation. It was between the ramp down to Jalan Kuching and the ramp up to Jalan Sultan Ismail near Sime Darby and Maju Junction. She knows now that it wasn’t the stork that flew her down to me from the baby-making clouds in the sky. So…
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Kitreena: Mom, did it hurt your vagina when you gave birth to me?
Mommy: Errr… yes, it did. But it healed. *hesitates between the truth and trying not to scare the young girl*
Kitreena: It healed?
Mommy: Oh yeah! I’m not walking funny, am I?
Kitreena: Ha ha ha ha ha ha. No! But why did it hurt?
Mommy: Okay, imagine squeezing a takraw ball through a hole yay big… *motions a hole the size of an IKEA meatball*
Kitreena: Whoaaaaaa! Mommy! Is that even possible?
Mommy: Huh, yeah! You’re here, baby.
Kitreena: No! What I mean is… how could I come out with my head yay big and your vagina yay small? *thanks iCarly for re-introducing the term ‘yay’*
Mommy: It did tear my vagina quite a bit because you came out very quick.
Kitreena: Ouchhh! Mommmm! Tear? *shrieks*
Mommy: But don’t worry. The doctor stitched me back up.
Kitreena: I still don’t understand. It wasn’t just my head. My whole body came out. I can’t imagine it!
Mommy: Wellllll… that’s the magic only mothers have, Monch!
Kitreena: You and your magic, Mom. *she rolls her eyes and knows I would say, “One day when you have children, you’ll understand the magic.”*
Mommy: One day when you have children, you’ll understand the magic.
Kitreena: Yeaah yeaah… *rolls her eyes some more*
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Posted in Monchies on April 25, 2012| 1 Comment »
The knock on the door at 6:00am was expected. It has been a five-morning-a-week routine for the past (oh-my!) almost two years. In came my Little Big Man in his yellow and green uniform.
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Edrick: Good morning, Mommy.
Mommy: Good morning, sunny boy.
Edrick: Mommmmm… *he isn’t his usual chirpy-birdie self*
Mommy: What is it Monch?
Edrick: I miss Daaaady. *puts his head on my tummy and hands rubbing his eyes*
Mommy: I know, sweetheart. I am sure Daddy misses you too.
Edrick: Does Daddy have a new husband?
Mommy: I don’t think so, baby. A new wife, maybe. But not a husband.
Edrick: Owww! Owww! I mean, wife! Hehehe I forgot. *“forget” is his excuse for everything these days, especially for mistakes*
Mommy: I know what you mean, baby. But I don’t know the answer.
Edrick: Daddy has a new wife, and is that why he doesn’t love you anymore?
Mommy: I don’t know sweetheart. I can’t tell you what I don’t know, can I?
Edrick: No, you can’t. But why doesn’t he tell you about it?
Mommy: I have no idea why, Monch.
Edrick: You sure don’t know much, huh?
Mommy: Yup, I sure don’t know much more than much. But I do know for sure that Daddy loves you very much.
Edrick: But he doesn’t tell me much.
Mommy: I think it’s time for breakfast, my boy.
Edrick: But I love you very much, Mommy. *rubs his face on my tummy and dries his tears with my pyjamas*
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Edrick went downstairs for his breakfast. I got up and was somehow glad I didn’t know much.
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Posted in Monchies, tagged Parenting on March 27, 2012| Leave a Comment »
Edrick committed a serious offense yesterday. He used a bad word! Though I am not going to repeat his sentence here fully, he said to Adam: “You and your family are a bunch of _____ people!” We were on our way home from school when this was reported to me by the officer in-charge, Little Miss Inspector. My jaw dropped to the pedals! I don’t use that word, or that kind of word on anyone. It has no use.
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Using bad words is a serious crime in my house (and in my car)! So I made it a big deal. Perhaps it was a bit bigger than what it should be, but I decided that Edrick had to learn it quickly. And Edrick knew what was coming. So yes, I gave him a hard time even though he had said sorry to Adam.
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I was trying to make a point that he has to manage his temper and that his words are solely his choice. I must have repeated myself more than 20 times, saying: Things you don’t say to yourself, you don’t say to others. I remember the version with Kitreena when she went through a similar phase being: “Only stupid people call others stupid.” Kitreena has long made enemy with the word. She calls it the ‘S’ word — can’t even bring herself to say ‘the S word’ with a voice.
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So Edrick is grounded for the whole week. No TV until Saturday, and no iPod or iPad for this weekend. He cried like there was no tomorrow when I read him the verdict. And now, he is serving his sentence… 20 lines per day for 5 consecutive days.
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Posted in Inside Enida, Monchies, tagged Parenting on February 17, 2012| 2 Comments »
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And every time she talks about you, her eyes twinkle.
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Posted in Humor, Language, Monchies, tagged Parenting on January 27, 2012| 6 Comments »
Ishhh! Angat ati sungguh kak hang ni petang tadi tak tau la nak habaq lagu mana. Kak ghiau-ghiau dok laghang depa bertaki beghebut TV, depa tak peduli. Bukan depa tak tau dah memang prinsip hidup mak depa ni, tak buleh lebih tiga kali warning. Asai lepaih amaran ketiga, soheh sogha mak depa ni tak dak perlahan daghipada guruh dah la.
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“Hangpa nak sangat dengaq sogha dainasurrr, mai sini! Jurasik tak jurasik. Sekali mak hangpa tempikkk, satu Mesra Terrace hilang habih kemesraan, okay! Amboooiii dia!”
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Dua-dua anak kak sipi-sipi nak kena sekehhh dah petang tadi ni. Ilang tak tau mana pi dah sabaq mak depa ni. Kak ghampaih remote control Astro mestro depa, tekan punat TV bagi mati. Paihtu hambat dua-dua oghang keluaq pintu. Yang si Adik dah cemaih dah kot mak dia ni nak halau dia pi duduk kandang kambin. Yang si Kakak berlagak cool lah lagi.
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Kak biaq depa dok menempek dua beghadik kat pangkin luaq pintu depan tu baghang 20 menet. Sambil kak kat dapoq dengan Bibik sibuk panggang ayam. Buleh dengaq yang si Kakak menyalahkan si Adik, yang si Adik tak mau abih teghiak ayaq mata dainasurrr — sungguh la baby-baby lagi anak kak yang kecik ni. Ghimaihhh kak haihhh!
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Keghin saja tangan kak lepaih dok peghisi ayam, kak pi jenguk depa dua beghadik kat luaq pintu. Dua-dua kena grounded takdak sapa buleh tengok TV sampai ujung minggu ni. Haa toddia, nak sangat hangpa noh. Hambikkk! “Mami tak mau dengaq lagi dah sapa salah, sapa tak salah. Oghang cakap baik-baik sampai tiga kali, telinga hangpa boh kat lutut. Nasib baik tak kena pulaih.”
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Depa masuk-masuk ghumah, kak hambat naik sughuh pi mandi. Kita satni nak makan ayam, kak tak mau anak-anak bau reban ayam. Tapi budak-budak ni memang kelaku dia dah. Sementagha nak menyampai bilik ayaq tu sempat lagi bertaki, tu yang kak tak paham tu. Kena bagi warning hat lain pulak.
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“Hangpa hingaq laaaa… hingaaaqqq! Sogha sapa Mami dengaq sampai kat dapoq satniiii… Mami bagi dia tulang ayam saja! Try test tengokkk!”
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Dan-dan sunyi sepi ghumah Mesra kak.
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Posted in Inside Enida, Monchies, Sense on January 25, 2012| 1 Comment »
It took me over a year to finally realize that I am now on my own. In this little wagon I am driving, there is only one driver seat. Gone are the days when I was just sitting in the passenger seat trying to make myself useful, pretending to know where to go and how to get there. Though I never held a map upside down, my journey came to a U-turn that turned out to be an I-turn when I, Enida the Questa è Enida, took a different path. My path. 😉
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Now, nevertheless, that I am behind the steering wheel on my own, I still don’t know where to go and how to get there. But I am doing it as I go along… with Monchies in the back seat. As long as we are on this journey together, I don’t really have to know where exactly we are going and how exactly to get there. We’re getting there, wherever there is. As a matter of fact, sometimes I don’t mind at all if we are not going anywhere. There is where we are. There is here. We’re together.
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But then, I know… I have to be prepared for my own inability to hold on to the steering wheel for ever. Anything can happen. Anytime. Just like what my insurance agent said (that got me to sign up with a plan), “Planning, if you asked me, should have been done yesterday. If anything happens today, your tomorrow is covered.” And so… I am writing my will and instructions. And in the process, I have been awakened by some gentle reminders that at some point of time I have to let go of everything.
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So when I saw my best friend recently, we had a good conversation to confirm what I would put in my will and instructions in the case of my absence — sudden or eventual. It was a sad but quick chat on where Monchies should go if anything happens to me. I fear not death, for I have embraced the reality that I am dying from the day I was born. I don’t mind death. (Hidup itu jodohnya mati, as I said to Cik Nan.) But I mind dying if I can’t live the remaining time to my full capacity.
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If I were given half a year, it is probably worth all the headaches of getting our Russian visas back so that I can be in the house where Monchies can have their Dad. I take no sympathy from him. No. But I know the kindest thing for me to do is to be kind to the kids, and kinder to their Dad. And I know that’s all that matters to Monchies anyway. If Daddy wouldn’t drop anything in this world for them, I would. At the end of the day, I could say I had dropped anything and everything for them. Drop dead! 🙂
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And six months would be enough for me to write a book on how happy Monchies would be and I know for sure they will miss me.
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I am not trying to be hopeless or morbid now. For heaven’s sake, I want to live as long as I can! I have so many I-told-you-so‘s to say to Kitreena and I have not rolled my eyes enough at Edrick’s jokes. We still have those trips to take: Kitreena wants me to take up snowboarding in the Swiss Alps with her, and Edrick is flying me to Rio, Rio, Rio! So help me God. If I can have 20 years, I will take 20 years. Or 30, max. But of course I can live without the headaches of getting our Russian visas back.
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On that thought, please pray for me… that my repeat blood test results would not number my days with the love of my life — the two good people I am raising in my Mesra house.
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Posted in Hurt, Monchies, tagged Parenting on January 18, 2012| 5 Comments »
It was Tuesday, twenty-three days after Christmas. I picked her up at school and while waiting for her brother who was having his guitar class, I told her that she was to Skype with Daddy on Wednesday. She looked surprised. For a few seconds she just stared at me with that searching look in her eyes. No words came from her mouth. Then she turned away.
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She covered her eyes with the back of her hand and I knew what was coming. Her right shoulder was shaking lightly to my touch. It was that silent cry that broke my heart to the finest pieces. She had nothing to say. All had been said the night she woke up crying when I kissed her in her sleep. She misses him. That’s all there is to it. What else? If it now comes down to me having to make an appointment for the kids to speak to their father, words sure don’t come easy.
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Posted in Monchies, tagged Parenting on January 16, 2012| 8 Comments »
It was Saturday and I was making some Ayam Goreng Kunyit with some French Beans. All sautéing in one pan on low heat just waiting to brown a bit, when I joined my little big man in the living room exercising his fingers on the PS3.
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Mommy: Hmmm… the whole house smells like my cooking, huh?
Edrick: Yeah, whatcha cookin’ Mom?
Mommy: Chicken.
Edrick: But it smells like scrambled eggs.
Mommy: Scrambled eggs? But I’m cooking chicken.
Edrick: But it smells like eggs.
Mommy: Hmmm… but I’m cooking chicken okay.
Edrick: Okay. But it smells like eggs.
Mommy: All right. But it’s chicken.
Edrick: I know, Mom. But I am telling you it smells like scrambled eggs.
Mommy: Sure, but that’s because eggs come from chicken.
Edrick: Oh yeah. That makes sense. Okay then.
Mommy: *is still puzzled by the instant and quick argument*
Edrick: But Mommm… the chicken sure smells like eggs.
Mommy: *malas mok argue suda, so she rolls her eyes and clucks away*
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