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Lekin really, mere dil ko kya ho gaya. Already. Mein weary beyond jawaab, beyond samje hain. Ho gaya. Malasssssss suda! Dil nahi. Lekin mere still lah jugak. Hishhh! Ke hairani.
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Archive for the ‘Sense’ Category
If You Asked Me
Posted in Inside Enida, Sense on May 26, 2011| 3 Comments »
When The Whole World Waits…
Posted in Sense, tagged Cats on May 14, 2011| Leave a Comment »
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Monchies and I are almost always drawn to comot cats. I don’t know what it is. When beauty strikes, I believe the opposite of beauty slashes. Even harder, stronger and deeper. So when we saw this on our way to the bicycle shop on Wednesday, the whole world had to wait. The bicycle shop included.
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Kitreena noticed that Ms A-beauty was pregnant. And Edrick immediately wanted to name her. I ended up making Ms A-beauty a street model. It wasn’t easy to get a shot of her half-black-half-gold face. Though we didn’t really want to disturb her supper, she looked like she wasn’t overly hungry either.
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I did wish, however, that Encik Mamak had put the fish on a banana leaf at the very least. For hygiene-purposes. Oh the path with good intentions…
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In Her Shoes
Posted in Inside Enida, Sense on April 29, 2011| 1 Comment »
“Orang macam Enida tu mana ada masalah. Kalau dia kata dia susah, itu susah yang dia sengaja cari. Takkanlah orang senang macam dia mengadu itu tak cukup, ini tak ada. Kalau dia mengeluh, itu tandanya dia tak bersyukur. Tuhan dah bagi kesenangan, serba-serbi melimpah ruah, lagi tak berterima kasih.
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Orang senang macam Enida mana boleh susah. Dia boleh tanggung semuanya sendiri. Tak payahlah susah-susah kerana dia. Buang masa saja. Pandai-pandailah dia nanti.”
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My Truth?
Posted in Reading, Sense on April 19, 2011| Leave a Comment »
I was hit the most by what is on page March 19 of the book:
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TRUTH
Are you living your truth? Is it based on your belief, in the deepest part of your heart? It is that thing you want to be, to do and have, about which you rarely speak to anyone. It is that sacred place in your spirit that lets you know no matter what, that you are really okay.
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Are you living your truth? Are you doing what brings you peace and joy? Are you smiling to yourself in the face of adversity, believing you are a divine creation through a loving father and mother? Are you beautiful and strong? Powerful and humble? Understanding and merciful? Intelligent and faithful? Protected and prayerful?
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Is your truth simply clear and simplistic? Does it bring you the understanding that all is well without, when all is well within? Are you living your truth all day, every day, when others tell you it is impossible, impractical, irrelevant and dumb? Is the truth of your being and expression of God?
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If not, are you really living?
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~ Iyanla Vanzant in her Acts of Faith
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Like Love
Posted in Sense, Write On on April 10, 2011| 2 Comments »
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I like sunflowers a lot. No I don’t love them. I just like them a lot. Love is too much. Always too much. So I just like. To be on the safe side.
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Older The Bolder
Posted in Inside Enida, Sense on April 6, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Getting older is a privilege, not a curse. And I am enjoying it every other month now taking myself to the salon to color my hair. I never had the chance to do this when I was younger. And now that I kinda have to do it, I am liking it. What a luxury!
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It’s not my birthday today. But I am pampering my feet tonight by surrendering them to Mr. iSqueeze. He’s always ready for me. All I have to do is turn him on. He’ll take me as I am. Yes, even when I am 81. You’ll see.
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🙂 This is a tribute to Ruth Johnson who gets a little older every April 6th. While she might not agree that getting older is (always) a privilege… I think she is the perfect picture of Graceful Aging. She gets older little by little, but she doesn’t get old.
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Like A Child Girl
Posted in Sense, tagged Parenting on April 3, 2011| 5 Comments »
The IKEA counters were not overly busy last Saturday afternoon and when I got to the cashier it was hard not to notice a family hanging around taking their sweet time licking ice-creams. Grandpa and Grandma were helping the grandson. Dad was a bit occupied with the shopping bags.
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In just a few seconds, Mother came into the scene with Girl – in a rush. An angry rush. She must have done something wrong that got Mother so upset. In fact, from the way she was poking on Girl on the shoulder and prodding her on the head, Mother was not just upset. She was furious!
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Girl, who looked about Kitreena’s age but many many sizes larger was crying embarassedly quietly. You know, that silent ‘hiccupy’ kind of crying when you can’t look anywhere else but down. That kind of crying you do when you can’t lift your face, your head and your spirit up. That was the saddest cry I had ever seen and would probably be the saddest cry I could ever recall. My heart wept.
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Grandma looked concerned, but in a split second seemed to ‘join’ Mother in madness. She then escalated the flaming anger and blurted it out in a voice so demeaning when she said to the grandaughter, “Sudah lah GEMOK!” My eyes were as wide open as my mouth. And then when Grandma saw me looking and noticing what was going on, she gave a huge friendly smile. No trace of guilt on her lips.
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For what had to be the first time ever in my life not smiling back… I, the Questa è Enida, was burned in anger! I felt like grabbing that poor little big girl, taking her home and giving her what every child deserves. Respect!
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Budi Bahasa Budaya Kita?
Posted in Culture, Language, Sense, Service on March 31, 2011| 5 Comments »
As soon as I got to the counter at Istana Budaya to pick up my LAT The Musical tickets this morning, I was not greeted by the lady behind the counter. She did not even look at me when I said my Selamat Pagi. I waited for her to say her Selamat Pagi back, but I would probably have had to wait until I heard a rooster crowing cock-a-doodle-doo the morning of April the first, or I might have to wait a year there – at the counter. So I decided not to bother.
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I asked her if my reservation was still kept since it was a day overdue. And when I showed her the reference number, she just glanced over it. No expression on her face. She still had not turned her face to look at mine. After about 20 seconds of silence and her tapping on her keyboard, she asked for the reference number again. L2C7WN it was. She could only recall the first three (L2C).
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“El dua si… apa tadi?”
So I gave her the full reference number, “El two see, seven double you enn.”
She repeated after me, “El dua si, tujuh… apa?”
I was just about to frown, but I didn’t. “Seven double you enn.”
She looked like she was ready to glance over my face, “Tujuh dabaliu en?”
“Ha’ah, tujuh double you enn. El dua see, tujuh double you en. Ada?”
“Enida Johnson ke?” Only then did she look at me and the bindi on my forehead and my cobalt blue punjabi suit..
“Ya, saya.”
“Enam ratus sembilan puluh sembilan ringgit. Nak bayar cash ke?”
“Ya, ya. Saya bayar tunai.”
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I said my “Thank You” twice. Once when I handed her the seven hundred ringgits, and once more when she handed over the one ringgit change. But today I just learned that at Istana Budaya there is no such thing as “Sama-Sama” or “You’re Welcome”. And oh, smiling is not allowed there too, if you work there.
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Bijak Sana, Sini?
Posted in Sense, tagged Sen on March 31, 2011| Leave a Comment »
When I said that there is more information in questions than in answers, I meant it. And I was ready to churn out some good examples to demonstrate what I meant. But in no time at all, I found them on Facebook! I personally and professionally think that Facebook is the social network platform best for social studies. Anyway, here we go:
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Mr. Hansamu : Ooooh I am starving!
Ms. Bakana Ona: Oh have you had lunch yet?
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And it was two o’clock in the afternoon.
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Seriously! How can one ask a question like so in response to a statement like so? What is not obvious? Am I missing something? Is it just me? Now I have a lot of questions!
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There is a saying in Bahasa Malaysia, “Malu bertanya sesat jalan.” (If you are too shy to ask – for direction – you will lose your way.) But I think we should be more ashamed of asking silly questions than anything. It is as though you were looking at a green apple and asking the seller, “Is this a green apple?” But of course, it is a fair question if you are color blind.
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And there is this belief that those who ask questions are smart. Wellllllllll! (Please take note of the length of my ‘well’ here okay?) Asking questions is one thing. And asking questions when you can find the answer yourself is another. That’s why I rolled my eyes like my eyes were the last eyes to roll when I saw this:
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Mr. Notsohansamu: Sedap nasi gurih ni.
Ms. Kawansibakana Ona: Nasi gurih tu apa?
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Uh? Search engine, people! Search engine! Yeah, not everyone knows what nasi gurih is. In fact, I don’t expect many Malaysians to know the term. I didn’t know what buah gandaria was until just a few years back. But that’s beside the point. It is simply beyond me when one is just not triggered to put effort in finding information by oneself. Afterall, if one can Facebook, can’t one Google? Haihhhh!
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By the way, I miss Nasi Gudeg on Williams Street, Northbridge that I used to mentedarah after bertandak when bergadang with my rodong. This Enida is so berlagu!
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Kasi Kasihan
Posted in Sense on March 21, 2011| 2 Comments »
Cakap kasarnya, encik boleh simpan sahaja lah simpati encik dalam kocek seluar encik yang kosong itu. Saya percaya ramai lagi wanita single, konon-single dan single-again di luar sana berminat dengan harta kekayaan yang encik warwarkan. Simpati itu, kalau encik nak bagi makan ayam belakang rumah pun bagus juga. Macam dedak. Saya tak berminat dengan kasihan-kasihan encik.
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Cakap kasarnya, walaupun nampak lembut, saya ini berhati batu. Berumah pun dalam Mukim Batu, sebelah Mukim Segambut. Jadi kalau encik nak ketuk, pastikan dulu tukul encik tu tak lembik macam alasan encik nak menolong saya sambil mintak saya belanja beli baju sukan encik yang tiga ratus tu, padahal saya baru bayar upah encik tiga ribu. Itu pun harga kawan-nak-tolong-kawan konon.
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Cakap kasarnya, saya ni tak bodoh. Sebab tu encik dapat apa yang encik berhak sahaja. Upah yang saya bagi encik tu pun kira mewah lah. Konon upah kawan-kawan. Kawan yang ikhlas tak macam encik. Tangan kanan menolong, tangan kiri hulur invoice. Kerja belum selesai dah mintak bonus. Encik ingat saya ni Kementerian Kebajikan Masyarakat ye? Saya tulus ikhlas nak berurusniaga dengan encik dan terus bayar upah encik walaupun kerja belum mula. Itupun tak ada Terima Kasih. Malah…
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Cakap kasarnya, encik itu cakap tak serupa bikin. Dalam pada encik nasihatkan saya bahawa, “Dalam sepuluh lelaki, sembilan adalah penyamun.” rupanya encik lah bapak kepada kesembilan-sembilan penyamun itu tadi. Hanya kerana saya tak dapat tolong belikan ganti telefon encik yang hilang kerana saya kesempitan wang, encik lari dengan RM300 saya yang encik mintak pinjam nak beli baju sukan encik itu tadi ya! Hina nya sifat dan sikap encik yang kononnya arkitek hebat itu.
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Tapi cakap kasarnya, saya ini tak kudis pun dengan RM300 yang encik hutang saya tu. Kegiatan mari mewarna bulanan saya di Okairi Great Eastern Mall pun dah RM380. Tak apa lah encik. Saya halal beghalal sajalah RM300 untuk orang seperti encik. Sudahlah tahu saya ini a single-mom anak dua yang tiada pendapatan tetap. Lagi nak mintak saya dahulu kan tiga ribu ringgit buat mengganti telefon encik yang hilang. Saya ni business mengajar bahasa je encik, bukan potong emas berlian. Encik Habib pun tak setuju kalau dia tau.
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Dan cakap kasarnya, bila encik tidak lagi menghubungi saya sebagai rakan niaga, saya pun lega. Rupanya encik ini begitu orangnya. Saya sangka kita boleh memperpanjangkan rezeki berniaga masing-masing dengan kejujuran dan keikhlasan. Rupanya encik cuma hendak mempergunakan sikap pemurah saya untuk kepentingan peribadi encik. Bila saya bolayan permintaan encik, putus hubungan niaga kita. Begitu ya?
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Semoga Tuhan lindungi saya dari Pirate of The Seremban seperti encik. Biarlah saya berniaga dengan Encik Merong Mahawangsa pula besok lusa walaupun beliau suka benar berlenggeng begitu. Mungkin bila saya sudah tak tahan melihat beliau tak berbaju begitu akan saya belikan beliau baju Nike. Itu pun kalau encik bayar hutang encik yang RM300 itu lah. Kalau tidak, encik lelaki, beliau pun lelaki, pandai-pandai lah cari baju.
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berlenggeng = topless
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