Dalam hati saya mengeluh…
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Tiap kali pucukku tumbuh kau bunuh.
Tiap kali pucukku tumbuh kau bunuh.
Hatiku jenuh mau bilang kepala butuh atau pegi mapuh.
Oh!
Tiba-tiba teringat sungguh
perjalanan dari Jenang ke Merapoh.
Dan hati saya rupanya patuh, sabar itu contoh.
Terus tak jadi menabuh.
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*Enida
13 June 2013
Depan Muzium Negara
(Tempat jatuh.)
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Posted in Poetry | Leave a Comment »
Come to think of it, I don’t want to save the world anymore. It’s not because I’ve tried. And it’s not because I’m tired.
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But the world doesn’t want to be saved.
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Those at war for a piece of barren land would still want to go to war for the sake of fighting for a piece of barren land. Fighting gives them something to do. They have something to die for and the war is something to die at.
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Those who no longer love their loved ones stay in their marriage or relationship (or partnership or whatever name they give their ship…) for the sake of their marriage. They are there for the sake of being there. The marriage gives them something to be there for when they have nowhere else to be at.
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When I came home from the land far away, I set myself out to save the world. I believed I had a beautiful soul and the whole world was supposed to be the garden of eden. Three years into this mission, I was woken up by a familiar song…
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But I could have told you Vincent… this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you.
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Posted in Hurt, Sense | Leave a Comment »
Sekitar tahun dua ribu tujuh saya menghadirkan diri ke majlis pengkebumian seorang yang tidak saya kenali sewaktu hayatnya. Yang saya kenal cuma isteri yang ditinggalkannya. Pemergian yang tiba-tiba. Terlalu awal. Terlalu tidak sempat semuanya.
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Saya tidak ikut ke pusara. Cuma berbual-bisik perlahan di anjung rumah bersama teman-teman yang turut hadir memberikan kekuatan kepada isteri almarhum. Tiba-tiba saya disapa dengan agak keras oleh seorang teman lama. Beliau bertanya…
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“Engkau lama di tanah arab, kan?”
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Saya mengangguk tersenyum sambil memberikan isyarat lima jari dan menyebut ‘lima tahun’ tanpa suara. Ini bukan majlis nya untuk saya berbual mesra. Saya tidak bermaksud mencari perhatian semua telinga yang mendengar dengan hati yang diam dan muram.
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“Lima tahun kat sana, balik tak reti-reti nak tutup kepala?”
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Saya membetulkan selendang dan bermohon diri. Sedih saya pada yang Tuhan panggil, tambah sedih mengenang yang jahil.
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Posted in Hurt, Sense | Leave a Comment »
If I am still writing, what do you want to read from me?
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If…
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Posted in Write On | Leave a Comment »
Now that I am in the online business, I sometimes think that love is like something you didn’t order, can’t return but have to pay for anyway. And some other times, it is like the only item you ordered, paid for many times over, never arrives and can’t cancel.
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Hmmm… hence the pause.
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Posted in Inside Enida | 3 Comments »
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The Universe Always Says Yes
.The universe (the energy of all that is in your life) will always say yes to your thoughts.
If you think negative thoughts, the universe will say, “Okay, I agree with you,” and bring you negative results.
If you think positive thoughts, the universe will say, “Okay, I agree with you,” and bring you positive results.
In every situation, the universe will say YES!
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~Joe Vitale
in Life’s Missing Instruction Manual.
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That’s why I always believe that if we call someone a donkey darling, the universe brings more donkeys darlings our way. I quit swearing long time ago, it was just too tiring. I guess you can tell by looking at how much energy I have now. Oh I am nice. Yes. That’s what I choose to be. But I am very choosy — about my thoughts, my words, and my darlings.
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Posted in Reading, Sense | Leave a Comment »
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Satu
Kau dan aku satu.
Yang kanan engkau
Yang kiri aku.
Peha dicubit
Yang sakit hati.
Sekarang pahit
manisnya… nanti.
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*Enida
Plaza Damas
22 February 2013
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Posted in Poetry | 2 Comments »
A little rub on her forehead and a gentle touch of brushing her hair with my fingers was enough to make her feel good. It was a scorching hot afternoon and there were just the two of us in the car waiting for Edrick to finish his after-school guitar class.
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Kitreena: Mom, you told me your Dad used to do this when you were little.
Mommy: Yup, and it was enough to put me to sleep.
Kitreena: Oh yeaaaaa… I am falling asleep here.
Mommy: I know.
There was a long pause, and there was the look on her face again. The look I have not written about for so long. Too long.
Kitreena: So Mommm…
Mommy: Here we go, I knew you were going to ask me a question.
Kitreena: *chuckles* When you get married again… what kind of man would you like to be your husband?
Mommy: “When“? You mean… “if” I get married again. Right?
Kitreena: No, when you get married again. You are going to get married again, aren’t you?
Mommy: I don’t know. I might not.
Kitreena: Awwww well, okay. Let’s say you are going to remarry… what kind of man do yo want?
Mommy: *feels almost embarrassed* I don’t know.
Kitreena: Are you going to marry an Asian man, or a Caucasian man?
Mommy: Does it matter, baby?
Kitreena: No, Mom. Not really. As long as he loves you.
Mommy: As long as he loves me and my kids.
Kitreena: I think you should marry a man who would give you the forehead rub. Sure feels good, Mom.
Mommy: Hahahaha yeah, you are right! I should!
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Posted in Monchies | Tagged Parenting, Single-Parenting | 2 Comments »
Sia nda mintak kau sisir sia punya rambut. Nda mintak kau beli sia punya simpu. Nda mintak kau bayar sia punya bil salon. Bah! Nda usah kau sibuk-sibuk papa jak sia mok bikin dangan sia punya kepala. Mok butak kah, mok ternak kutu kah, mok pakai tudung saji kah. Kau nda kenal sia, jangan kau pandai-pandai mok nasihat sia masam kau kenal sia ampatpuluh tahun. Masam kau tuh teda dosa jak kunuk. Banyak jak urang tutup di atas, bawah gik bikin foto kasi tease tanakwagu.
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Suda lah kau, sana kau pigi!
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Posted in Bebel, Sense | Leave a Comment »
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Questa è Enida 