Encik: Baju tu guna kain apa?
Enida: Baju tu guna kain pelikat buruk bapak saya.
Encik: Hah?
Enida: Kalau tak selesa kami guna kain lap pinggan.
.
[Jawapan dalam hati hanya nampak di status FB.]
.
.Photo credit: kealambarzakh.wordpress.com
.
.
Archive for the ‘Persona’ Category
Siri Bercakap Dengan Encik I
Posted in Airwings, Facebook, Humor, Sense on March 29, 2017| Leave a Comment »
Anal-ogy
Posted in Facebook, Sense on July 8, 2013| Leave a Comment »
I read a status on Facebook today that made me take really deep breaths after shaking my head in pity. There is just so much negativity floating around, it is worse that the worst haze!
.
But more than anything, what the person wrote was nothing but airing his own dirty laundry. And I was immediately thinking of an analogy…
.
.
So if you fart in public, (seriously!) because there is just no way you can hold the gas, do you yell, “EXCUSE ME! YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE! I FARTED! I JUST DID! THANK YOU.” Do you? Let say your fart is the silent-killer kind of fart. The kind you can’t tell coming until it chokes you to death. And you are gone in 2.571 seconds. Seriously, do you make an announcement that it was YOU who farted the farting stinky fart?
.
You don’t.
.
There are things you don’t make public. There are things you don’t tell. Or shouldn’t. You are just a human, let’s get over it. You fart. When things get worse, you fart liquid. The worst… solid. Regardless of the output, you fart. You fart because you cannot NOT fart. Or you’ll be floating in the air just like the negativity that is floating around worse than the worst haze. And you are worse because you will explode if you don’t fart.
.
I digress, yes, but seriously… can we just focus on the solutions? If you live your life without problems – or what I would rather call challenges, you won’t achieve anything. I am trying very hard to not to say, “If you don’t want challenges in life, go die.” I don’t have the heart to say that. Let me just say this:
.
If you don’t want to fart, don’t eat.
.
.
Pelat dan Terencat
Posted in Facebook, Language, Sense on August 13, 2012| Leave a Comment »
Kalau lah komentar-komentar di Facebook itu saya baca betul-betul mengikut ejaan yang digunakan penulisnya, ramai benar rakan-rakan dan kenalan Facebook saya yang sama ada pelat atau terencat.
.
Contoh:
Law ko ad mse, jom r kt g param kt ipo bble nk?
Kalau kau ada masa, jom lah kita pergi Pasar Ramadhan dekat Ipoh bila-bila nak?
.
Oh tomeiiii nya tucin u ni. Tomeiii tangat.
Oh comel nya kucing you ni. Comel sangat.
.
Susah betul rasanya untuk saya hormati orang-orang yang ambil mudah soal bahasa. Dan tak dapat saya bayangkan bagaimana malangnya nasib generasi akan datang yang ber-ibubapa kan mereka yang terencat dan tak pandai mengeja ini.
.
Facebook bukan lah lagi tempat ‘suka-suka’ kerana ia merupakan sebahagian besar dalam kehidupan kita sekarang. Setiap tabiat kita di Facebook akan menjadi kebiasaan dan menjadi identiti kita, mahu tidak mahu, sedar atau tidak.
.
Kalau bahasa itu jiwa bangsa, bahasa yang bagaimana kah yang kita gunakan dalam pertuturan harian? Adakah kita bercakap pelat kerana kita rasa comel bercakap seperti kanak-kanak berumur 2 tahun begitu? Kalau bahasa itu jiwa bangsa, yang kita tulis di status Facebook itu bukan bahasa?
.
Di universiti di Russia, terdapat Jabatan Bahasa Melayu yang mengkaji dan mengajar Bahasa Melayu kepada penutur bahasa lain. Dan penuntutnya fasih menutur dan menulis dalam Bahasa Melayu. Itu di Russia. Tak usah lah saya sebut apa yang ada di England, America dan Australia. Apa alasan kita bila ejaan kita sesingkat akal kita?
.
Kalau anda sedang memikirkan alasan nya sekarang, bahawa Facebook itu hanyalah suka-suka dan main-main, dan bahawa bahasa singkat, pelat dan terencat yang kita guna kan itu sekadar mengisi waktu bosan… benar lah jangkaan saya. Orang kita memang hebat beralasan.
.
.
Malu Kucing
Posted in Facebook, Sense, Write On on February 17, 2012| Leave a Comment »
Perbezaan di antara kucing lapar dengan kucing lapar yang bijak ialah…
.
Kucing lapar akan menjilat bibir apabila terpandang sahaja akan makanan. Tetapi kucing lapar yang bijak hanya akan menjilat bibir sesudah makan.
.
Sekian melaporkan pemerhatian sifat manusia gelojoh dan tak tau malu mengalahkan kucing kurap di Facebook.
.
..
Ooh sang algojo, ooh nanti dulu…
.
.
.
You Who?
Posted in Facebook, Sense on November 13, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Dear ladies and gentlemen who have requested to be on my Facebook friends list, could you please have the courtesy of introducing your GOOD selves to Enida? Please. Thank you for the honor, but I don’t know everybody. And I don’t think I can know everybody.
.
In my years of teaching, coaching, training, speaking and blogging, I might have spoken to, met, seen, touched, laughed at, smiled to, been read and touched by, smooched, slapped and kicked a few Fadzillahs, Soo Lins, Azuras, Letchumis, Khairils, Khairuls, Ridzuans, Ah Bengs, Aruns, and a few Michaels and Michelles here and there. In fact, I did karate a few Al-Balooshis and Al-Harthys back in the Arabian Peninsula between the year 2000 and 2005.
.
So, do justice to — no one else but — yourselves. Introduce yourselves, please. You don’t expect me to be able to tell the difference between Iwan the Dangdut composer/singer and Iwan the cute boy from my Prep Course in Kuantan with your profile picture of a cat licking its balls, do you?
.
.
.
Kalau kata, kotakan.
Kalau soal, jawapkan.
Kalau janji, tunaikan.
Kalau pinjam, pulangkan.
Kalau beri, ikhlaskan.
Kalau hutang, lunaskan.
Kalau pesan, sampaikan.
Kalau rahsia, simpankan.
Kalau salah, maafkan.
Kalau rajuk, pujukkan.
Kalau sayang, tunjukkan.
Kalau terima, kasihkan.
Hidup bukan paparan Facebook.
Kita ada kita.
Kita ada Dia.
.
*Enida
September 29, 2011
Mesra Terrace
.
.
Nik Of Time
Posted in Persona on February 7, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Ja…
I have seen a bit of the world, enjoyed, suffered in and weathered around some foreign land and even the no-man’s land. But it was you who first gave me the pictures of the world to dream by.
.
It was you who built the images of ‘Rumah Seronok’, helped me envision mystical meadows, singing ‘Oh What A Beautiful Morning, Oh What A Wonderful Day’ as a starter. An appetizer for me to go ahead and taste the world.
.
You dreamed with me back then, and you picked up my shatered dreams when I was too broken to do it myself. It was, for all God’s intent and purpose of sending you to me, you. None others.
.
So Ja, for all that you have been, all that you are, and all that you have become… Happy Birthday.
.
You are loved. And very much so.
.
Cute Lah Bang!
Posted in Persona, tagged Parenting on September 2, 2010| Leave a Comment »
Tonight I accidentally re-opened a picture of a child’s handwriting sent by a good friend of mine. It is of his six-year old son who made a checklist of what he did when the dad was away the one particular night. The boy calls his dad ‘Baba’ and calls himself ‘Abang’ in his checklist.
.
- Nengok cerita alia.
- Main game PS2 dengan main PSP.
- Main mainan.
- Bila Baba pergi mana-mana Abang nengok katun.
- Tidur pukul 10.
- Bangun sahur pukul 5.
.
And at the end of every item, he drew a small checkbox. Only the first two items were checked, though. I wonder if Abang fell asleep at 9pm. But I actually have one important question to Baba… if he is reading:
.
Bila Baba pergi mana-mana, Abang nengok katun kan? Tapi bila Abang pergi mana-mana, Baba nengok apa ek?
.
Hehe hehe hehe hehe hehe.
.
I think Abang’s checklist and checkboxes are super cute. Cute lah bang, Aunty Nid suka.
.
Lee Ngor
Posted in Persona, tagged Me on August 20, 2010| 5 Comments »
From the corner of my eyes I knew she was eyeing me. In fact, she scouted around me, walking nervously in loops before disappearing behind the airport exhibition partition board, perhaps trying to gather some courage to do what she had to do to me.
.
Just when I was not looking – or honestly trying not to look – she came back with her nervous smile that almost looked like a pain on her face. She said her ‘hello’ but I squeezed my lips tightly together and gave her a sigh, consciously refraining myself from saying, “Yeah yeah… what do you want?”
.
And when she said, “On behave of the LCCT airport blah blah blah blah blah…” I was ever so ready to correct her pronunciation of the word behalf. Plus, I was at KLIA, not LCCT. Hello miss, hello miss, yenna solla poringa? Mimpis kah kawu hini?
.
However, into the second minute of the survey interview and after knowing that her name was Lee Ngor, which made me think of Lee Young in Singapore… I started to have some painless smiles on my face. Surprisingly, I was kind of enjoying having someone asking me about what I like and what I would like to have at an airport.
.
At the end of the interview, Lee Ngor took out a red leaflet from her tote bag and handed it to me, thanking me almost profusely. Hmmm… now that I have a voucher for a room at a nice new hotel, maybe I too should conduct a survey in order to decide whom to take with.
Ehem!
.
Oooh Enida, behave!
.
Granny Award
Posted in Persona, tagged Wonder Woman on February 26, 2010| 1 Comment »
.
I am holding this person responsible for putting a huge burden of knowledge on my shoulders. She is the cool-prit who taught me how to make Roti Canai/Paratha – the dough and and the kibar-mengibar skills, all inclusive. Yes! I mean, no! I will not forget her curries either. From the karipuley, parippu curry (Dhal-Cha) right to the very composition of the song collaboratively called Walpajriwanenassedapsangaaat.
.
This woman is also the holder of the award ‘Pembuat Cekodok Terpaling Bulat Dalam Dunia’ peringkat Sungai Siput (U), Perak. Hah, dah ter… ada paling pulak lagi tu! Di samping itu, beliau juga adalah pemegang anugerah ‘Pembuat Putu Piring Paling Kemas’ peringkat dunia, kategori Pasar Malam dan Siangku. Imagine if she can round the Cekodok Pisang as round as pingpong balls, Putu Piring is sooo kacang Ngan Yin.
.
But this 80-something Achamma of mine is entirely accountable for giving me her goodlook without feeling any remorse! I have no more to say to her but… thank you Pah, for the grace.
.
.
-
In Her Words…
In Her Thoughts…
In Her Time…
In Her Search…
In Her Count...
- 149,448 hits
In To Her…
In Her Mind…
-
Join 82 other subscribers
Visitors
Questa è Enida 